Starting With What You Have: The Scholarship

It has always been my dream to provide affordable or free education in my society, (to mention but one of these basic necessities I intend to help people with to improve their quality of living).

love-aludo_hovasabee

My life is not perfect,…yet…but I have always had the culture of sharing my resources with people who have less, who need it, people I know and those I don’t. My siblings and I learnt it from our parents.

I had a friend of mine from my department in my previous University place an announcement for applications for Financial Aid for students from low-income homes in the Department’s Facebook Group.

I didn’t want them to know it was me, and they had to send the essay “How Education Has Changed My Life” to an email address that I have, and I’m sure they wouldn’t guess was mine. I graduated in 2011, so they wouldn’t guess…I think, I’m sure.

Another friend of mine wants me to make it a real scholarship with my name attached to it, but I’m like, I really just want to share from my own monthly scholarship money for now, I’m not some rich lady (yet) trying to give away a huge sum. I want to start with connecting first of all, starting from my own home university where I graduated from, to connect with someone like me, someone who is eager to learn, who seizes opportunities, someone who needs the cash to live relatively more comfortably while they study, and not to stress about the many financial cares of this world…lol

When I was still in the University of Benin, I would just walk up to the freshman class in my department and reach anyone I was led to with what I had, just to encourage them.

(In another post I will share with you how somehow in 2015, one of the students in 100 level I encouraged with a small cash gift (in 2008) for being a good goalkeeper for our team, helped me in Abuja on the eve of my passport appointment (about 2 a.m September 2015), when I was stranded. I didn’t even know his name, but my friend Emmanuel kept calling his name as if I knew him and it didn’t ring any bell).

Giving is my life, education is one of my passions and this could get big in future, it will get big, but my dilemma now is, should I tell them it’s me? I have a good reputation in the department, but I don’t want too much formalities to slow down this process, the deadline is 30th March, no one has responded yet.

My friend who lectures in the department made an announcement to the students and some of them screamed “How Much?” I laughed and said “That’s cute but that’s not what I’m looking for. I want to connect with someone, someone who doesn’t care how much it is, someone who has a hunch and the passion and goes for it, someone like me, it sounds selfish but someone like me”. The amount is relatively big anyway, it’s my biggest giveaway, and I’m happy just thinking about it, knowing that I’m going to put a smile on someone’s face from behind the heavy drapes without showing my face I guess, and peep and watch as that person or those two students rejoice, as I do, everytime my application goes through.

Now I know what it feels like to be on the other side of a scholarship application, or perhaps. It seems small now, but I know it’s going to get bigger. And I’m glad already. It’s something I should have started as part of my NGO in 2015 before I left for school, but it’s never too late. Let’s help improve someone’s life, let’s make education less of a burden, let’s promote a good cause.

 

BEING OWED AND IGNORED BY DEBTOR

IF YOU OWE SOMEONE, and you know you cannot pay, it’s better to ask for mercy than to give false hope or to ignore them or insult them when they ask for their right.

 
IF YOU VOWED IN CHURCH or pledged to pay or you owe tithe or offering, sincerely ask GOD for mercy and move on, don’t let any pastor or spiritual leader make you believe that you will be under a curse or God will visit you with judgement or the following bad things that will happen to you are your punishment for not fulfilling your vow.
 
KNOW THIS Jesus gave a parable of a king that forgave a huge debt. He was only mad that this forgiven fellow did not forgive his mate who owed him less. God does not need your 50k, so don’t think He is having sleepless nights planning your revenge.
 
IF YOU OWE SOMEONE AND YOU KNOW WHAT IT TOOK THEM TO GIVE YOU THAT STUFF, and you know how to get the cash to repay them, don’t be heartless, pay up, or beg them to understand and extend your due date or plan to pay in installments, just don’t ignore them, remember Scriptures, He that repayeth evil for good, evil will never leave his house, Prov 17:3
 
If you somehow pledged in church and cannot pay and asked God for forgiveness and you moved on, but you will not forgive someone who owes you less and has actually begged you (although some people are to proud to beg for forgiveness) then that’s where the problem lies.
 
IF SOMEONE OWES YOU and you know they are too wicked or to broke to repay you and you automatically forgive them, or even pray to GOD to provide for the broke ones or have mercy on the evil ones, just believe that God who sees the heart, will definitely repay you, so if you can, let it go and if you go to the law concerning the wicked ones, you won’t be wrong! And please, if you owe, pay up or humbly ask for reconsideration.

Don’t Panic, Take it Easy, It will pass

aludo-love-hovasabeeThis may not work for everyone but here’s my story,

Toward the end of last year, I was super stressed. O I thought I was going to just fail all my exams and retake or forfeit my scholarship. There was so much to read that I hadn’t opened, plus we needed to find a place in Madrid, and two more exams to go, out of which I have to write three papers, while everyone in my class writes two.

So Lupo’s deadline is on the 7th, the next is on the 14th, o God no.

On Friday morning, I still didnt have a topic. That was the 6th. Just kill me.

 

I wrote an email to my prof saying that I wanted to retake…so imagine requesting to retake when the due date hadn’t even come. At 6pm that evening, I tried to get to it. I prayed. God help me.

6,000 words, tomorrow, I don’t have a topic. Prof is yet to reply me, maybe he doesn’t want to because of the holidays. Immediately after a topic hit me, I felt a rush, I went to bathe, and I  was hungry, but Hola, in Madrid, all the stores were closed, it was the Festival of 3kings. The chinese were awake but they only accept cash.

 

I had a topic, I had a card, I was hungry, it was 8pm, I hadn’t eaten all day, my deadline is tomorrow. Can’t kill myself, I went back home, made spaghetti and slept.

What ever should happen should come and happen abeg…I woke up at 1:30pm  the next day…lol…but guess what, I submitted before 7th January midnight, I didnt add all my references because I didn’t want to be late to submit, but I read it this evening and it looked good.

I hope I get good grades. It was ok for a one night stand…

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COUNTDOWN TO LEAVE HIM

Today’s date was amazing, 🙂  but it’s just a number, no he’s not.

He’s not just a number, I don’t know if it’s going to last or not, they hardly ever do. Just say no to sex or when they get handsy and you’ll never see them again.

And I don’t know if this guy’s just really cool or building up and marking time, but he seemed really cool.

Before I went out to meet him I had told my friend that look, he and I had a chat fight this morning,(actually I was the only one venting) and he’s acting really normal, I have to wear bullet proof tonight cos it looks like he wants to snipe me…lol

What started it? I asked him to resend any messages I may have missed since Samsung cleared my entire phone (apps, contacts, whatsapp, etc) and he sent me a screenshot. Behold, he saved my number as “Niger”…and it was funny but I kinda got mad like “I’m not even sure you know my name” called him stupid, said I didn’t want to be his friend anymore, then I came back and said I was sorry, but I still don’t wanna be your friend anymore, and he said cool.

We already planned a date for tonight so I thought it would be over, but it wasn’ttttttttt. Since we’re cool again (how many times have I used that word?) I went out, we had a nice time, and i didn’t get a whole bunch of what he was saying because I’m still learning Italian, but thanks to Google translate, we still had so much fun. And then at some point, he said in Italian “this is the same girl who called me stupid today” I heard that, and we just laughed, in a scary movie that would be the part where he would pull out a gun.

Why am I so dark?

I don’t wanna know. Well, one thing he doesn’t know is that I’m leaving Rome soon. I ran my mouth with other guys and they didn’t want nothing to do with the unkissable untouchable temporary girl, I don’t want to ruin this with my mouth so…I like you, but I cant tell you I’m leaving, and this might hurt but…today’s date was awesome…14 days to go

I know it’s mean but, it’s my dilemma.

Simple Tips: Beautiful Wedding, Zero Stress

It’s as simple as ABC, and I don’t mean the 26 alphabets.

Just ABC is fine, or as easy as blinking. 🙂

Just focus on three things;

  • 1.       The Almighty God who has brought your love life to this point
  • 2.       The picture of your happy union which is about to blossom in newer ways than you ever knew
  • 3.       The budget, cos there’s life after the wedding.

 

Truth be told, too many opinions cause wedding planning stress, and when it comes to opinions, everyone has them, even you, thinking about things like:

  • Who do we invite, who’s going to get angry?
  • If we don’t have a five foot tall cake, people will think we are poor.
  • My mum doesn’t like the venue, your dad doesn’t like the pastor.
  • My friends would like to wear a certain fabric together.
  • If we do just a court wedding, people will think I was pregnant before marriage.
  • I want to wear a red dress but I don’t want them to think I couldn’t afford to at least rent a wedding dress.
  • I really would like to sing on my wedding day but I don’t want them to say I copied Sara (whoever that is)
  • My wedding cards are ugly, I really don’t want wedding cards unless they’re as amazing as I imagined when I was 5, I want them to open the card and then this bright light shines and my intending and I reflect on the walls of their room and start giving an invitation speech with music playing on the background.
  • I want to arrive in a limo, I can’t believe we don’t have a car. He doesn’t have a car?
  • If we don’t do prewedding videos and photos, they will think we are not goofy or romantic. Our prewedding pics should be taken by a professional, we can’t just use our phones.
  • Why is she using her natural hair? The ring is not golden? She made herself up? The dress is not from Italy? I can’t believe they’re serving just snacks! Why is  everywhere so hot? 
  • Why is the Pastor preaching? They didn’t get a live band, the dress was ugly, he didn’t wear a suit, there were no bridesmaids, I wasn’t invited, I wasn’t a bridesmaid, she sold the asoebi, I gave mine for free, why is she rushing the wedding, is he on a love potion? Why is she still wearing a white dress, all her exes are here and two of her daughters are on the bridal train.

 

Just LET IT GO!

You can do it on the balcony with your parents and the pastor, look good, take pictures, share them on Facebook, Insta, anywhere you wish.

You don’t have to invite the world, you don’t have to please everyone, only very few people care about your happiness, attending your wedding is not always a sign of love, close your heart to what people have to say, it’s your day, it’s about you, God and the future with your love. My friend who got married last week always used to say ‘As long as the groom is there, the bride is usually not going to notice”.

And if you have been blessed with great and understanding friends, they’ll admire you for the simplicity and classiness of your wedding and the maturity of your mind and your choices. Even if you have all the money in the world to spend, still focus on God, your union and the budget, not on what anyone tries to suggest. Ideas are easy to come by sometimes, talk is cheap.

A married man said to me over office lunch one day “I saw a different person in my wife when she was planning our marriage, she was fierce, tense, easily angered…I said, ‘but I don’t have that kind of money’, and she said she would borrow”

Another friend speaking about her friend’s breakup said “He called off the wedding because according to him, in his entire life, since he was a kid, he has never been involved in so many arguments as he has in the past three months since they started planning the wedding, not from his friends, sisters, aunts, never”.

Don’t start your wedding with debts, life goes on, don’t plan your wedding with fights and misunderstandings, love goes on, never leave God out of it, apply wisdom, knowing God is true wisdom, a wise woman builds her house, a lot that is said about the virtuous woman is about spending, creating wealth, savings, giving her husband someone to trust and compassion.

You’re about to start a life of planning and executing, both for him and the kids and your grandkids, don’t stress yourself, let it come naturally, spend wisely, let your husband-to-be, know that his peace is assured with you, forever, no stress, no debt, as much as it lies in your power, use wisdom, where it’s beyond you, remain focused on the One who brought you together, listen to good counsel, ignore anything or anyone that’s going to try to steal your joy with opinions, your wedding is not a show to impress anyone, if they want entertainment, they know where to go.

This is your big day! In future,as your wealth increases, if you want another party, with a dress, a cake and all, YOU STILL CAN HAVE IT! Even if you want to recreate the walk down the isle, with friends watching again, o please, have fun, do it as many times as you want.

Nothing stops you from celebrating love and renewing your vows again and again and again!

For now, learn to politely tell those who  are putting unnecessary pressure on you that you and your husband are trying to create a beautiful memory, and it’s not a show, mind who you’re listening to, always choose happiness.

Create a beautiful memory…

I hope this helps!

Can I Pray Just Once Over A Pressing Desire?

Do you pray over and over for the same meal when you sit to eat?

That’s faith! You know the food is blessed, you know God heard you, you go on and eat it and you’re healthy and bubbly, so why is it different when we pray for more pressing needs?

It’s not more difficult for God to hear your cry than it is for Him to bless your food…it can be really tempting to keep reminding God when you’re desperate, I have a clear notice at the entrance of my room, u see it as soon as u open the door,

“God heard you, just be patient”

Praising while you wait also helps your heart feel merry, Jesus gave a clear instruction when He said “Let not your heart be troubled”

God loves to be believed and trusted. Keep praising Him, keep meditating on His promises and He will reveal His plan to you as you fill yourself up with more of Him.

He is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that you can ever ask or think according to the power that is at work within you…fill yourself up with Him, in the midst of that trial.

You can pray amiss but you can’t praise amiss. God inhabits praises, invite him with words and melodies of adoration. Keep singing His words back to Him, and praise Him with the loving expressions of your soul, because you know He always comes through, “it is through faith and patience that we inherit the promise” while you wait, praise, and have this confidence, according to 1 John 5:14-15

14 This is the [remarkable degree of] confidence which we [as believers are entitled to] have before Him: that [a]if we ask anything according to His will, [that is, consistent with His plan and purpose] He hears us. 15 And if we know [for a fact, as indeed we do] that He hears and listens to us in whatever we ask, we [also] know [with settled and absolute knowledge] that we have [granted to us] the requests which we have asked from Him.