Because You Seem Brighter

stop playing safeBecause you’re beautiful, you will be hated

Because you’re smart, you wil be despised

Because you’re rich, you will be talked about

because you’re making good decisions, you will be put down

Because you feel good about yourself, you will be misunderstood

Heart gets broken, yet we still love

Stop playing safe, live life the best way that you can

And let people be people

Yes, people will be people

Another species of social animals that walk on twos, eat, poop and talk

Is that all you’re worried about?

Someone like you?

But someone less motivated?

Soaked in rivalry and unhealthy competition?

Is that enough?

Shouldn’t that push you further on?

You’re stronger than this, you know…

You’re stronger

The crown is heavy, but remain on the brighter side…

 

Can I Pray Just Once Over A Pressing Desire?

Do you pray over and over for the same meal when you sit to eat?

That’s faith! You know the food is blessed, you know God heard you, you go on and eat it and you’re healthy and bubbly, so why is it different when we pray for more pressing needs?

It’s not more difficult for God to hear your cry than it is for Him to bless your food…it can be really tempting to keep reminding God when you’re desperate, I have a clear notice at the entrance of my room, u see it as soon as u open the door,

“God heard you, just be patient”

Praising while you wait also helps your heart feel merry, Jesus gave a clear instruction when He said “Let not your heart be troubled”

God loves to be believed and trusted. Keep praising Him, keep meditating on His promises and He will reveal His plan to you as you fill yourself up with more of Him.

He is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that you can ever ask or think according to the power that is at work within you…fill yourself up with Him, in the midst of that trial.

You can pray amiss but you can’t praise amiss. God inhabits praises, invite him with words and melodies of adoration. Keep singing His words back to Him, and praise Him with the loving expressions of your soul, because you know He always comes through, “it is through faith and patience that we inherit the promise” while you wait, praise, and have this confidence, according to 1 John 5:14-15

14 This is the [remarkable degree of] confidence which we [as believers are entitled to] have before Him: that [a]if we ask anything according to His will, [that is, consistent with His plan and purpose] He hears us. 15 And if we know [for a fact, as indeed we do] that He hears and listens to us in whatever we ask, we [also] know [with settled and absolute knowledge] that we have [granted to us] the requests which we have asked from Him.

Video of Birthday Celebration from All Over The World for Her Excellency Patience Ambode

Video

Here’s a woman I’d like you to meet 🙂

Yes with all the unfair treatments in the world, there are still some people whose joy you share and whose testimony you celebrate from afar, unknown to you that one day, your paths will cross sweetly and unforgettably.

Besides my sweet mum, who remains the sweetest and most sacrificing woman in my life, God has shown me favour immensely through some of his people on earth.

I could say the story of how we met but I don’t know if you’ll be patient enough to read that episode through because I want you to watch this video fast….hehe

Thank you for being a sweet part of my life Mummy Ambo…

Christmas 2015

I wish I knew where to start from but I don’t. Most times the deepest feelings of joy are the hardest to write about(of every emotion actually)

I’m very surrounded by love. God has been more than faithful.

Sometimes I look back and thank God for how I survived living in my aunt’s house during my youth service, I have totally forgiven her but whenever I think of the extremities, drama, lies, hypocrisy and hurting someone just because you think they are ‘kids’ and no one will listen to them or maybe your children won’t even want to hear their side of the story, whenever I think of these, I just smile and thank God…my soul is beautiful, I won’t wait for anyone to say it to me. I feel divine and I know it’s a gift of God’s.

 

God’s love for me is ever so amazing. He made me go through that and I learned service, I learned how to live with cunningness and to survive hate. I learned to love more in spite of conspiracy, but it also had a negative effect, I see women leaders in church and just wonder who they’re torturing at home and what innocent girl they’re trying to bring down and why?

It’s Christmas, I’m meant to write a happy post, but every time I feel this immense love, and it happens all the time, I try to wonder what she hated in me. We cool now, but sometimes, thinking of where you’ve been helps you appreciate more, where you are and where God is taking you. I feel I’m still going to ask her some day what the matter really was from the start, I’m just curious, I want to know, or I just want to help, I’m curious, cos I can’t imagine treating any of my future nieces that way.

 

She doesn’t know the value of the forgiveness I offered, and from the way it seems, her kids think it’s the other way round, but I know what it cost me, even though I freely gave it, I feel great, the feeling you get when you let go of a huge amount of money for a great cause that offers you no returns, that feeling when they don’t know how much something costs but you and God do and it makes you feel closer to divinity, that feeling when you give joyfully and sacrificially but no one even knows it was you or knows what it costs you but it binds you closer to God’s heart, I feel so beautiful within, and I never ever give anyone the opportunity to make me hurt myself with unforgiveness, I remember Joseph smiling and saying to his brothers, (not with hate, but with sweet overwhelming tearful joy) “You meant it for evil but God…” I feel beautiful, I’m very surrounded by love, I have spent  the last 4 christmasses (including yesterday) without feeling like a slave, and it has been joyfully overwhelming…

I forgave the moment I packed my boxes and walked out that door that night, not knowing where I was going…It’s paradoxical to say this but that moment I walked out was  my “Father forgive them”…I don’t remember right now the face of any of the guys that were sent by a stranger in the UK (very impromptu) to come pick me from the front of my aunt’s house with my three boxes, to take me to his place where I slept that night but that was the beginning of my strange manifestations.

 

That’s when I exposed myself to the open arms of love waiting for me in the real world, where if there are streaks of envy and hate, I just smile, calm myself down and say “relax girl, you’ve seen worse and nothing can be worse than that”, to a zone where it’s just God and I, I see man in his frailty, mortality, animality, and I spread hope no matter what…everything else has been a  miracle, more love guys, more genuine love, less hate.

It was like a phase, that one year was like a curtain, I was innocent and naive, was having a great life, happy, strong (I’ve always been this one, and it’s God, I don’t know how), joyful, spreading cheers, then I passed through that unbelieveable one year, and came out still innocent but more aware of the negativity in my world. This is not good for children or someone much younger, it could damage them, but I’m happy I had it at the time I did, and I had a good sense of judgement, and it didn’t change me. In fact my song was love before, then it became more love.

I wish you all a beautiful end of year and i pray that God puts more good people on our way, and help us to continue to overcome, no matter what or who happens…close your eyes, smile and take it all the fresh air you can…you are beautiful within, guard your heart and stay joyful.

doreen and me

My charming niece (from a long family path) and i can’t ever wrap my head around hurting her, we’re too far apart in age and experience…family should be held most high, love.

 

More love guys, more Jesus.

#NP John Legend You and I

 

 

 

For Your Glory – Tasha Cobbs

I do love to pout.

love Aludo_For your glory Tasha Cobbs

And many times, when I wake up, when I’m joyful, when I’m just back to my door from school or work< I go “A thousand kisses to you Lord”

 

I wanna see God, after all of this, I really do.

So living right, drawing men to Him, being great at whatever I do so that people can be drawn to my God and having an excellent spirit, mature, full of wisdom and beyond human understanding is a lifestyle, He enables me, I try, then he enables me…

Glory is something to-die-for, I don’t know how to put it, can’t explain…but really, thank you Tasha Cobbs for helping us express it in this song, cos I would anything to see this God, cos I love Him, cos I’m a huge huge fan and beneficiary, cos I got questions too…and cos I wanna just rest and play with my eternal Love, to behold Him…to just be there, right next, in His own home…chilling  with ma senior love…
“I wanna be where You are”

Daddy remembers…

I'm not chubby, God gave me happy cheeks...lol

I’m not chubby, God gave me happy cheeks…lol

More than twice in the past two years, including 2015, my dad would encourage me by reminding me of those things I did for God as a child. He’d list them all and I’d  start crying and then he’d add that God has not forgotten, and God is not unfaithful.

Tonight, I was just remembering, 7 year old me, gathering kids in church to come around for evangelism and hospital visitations, I think the world was safer then and parents had more trust…we walked far and wide with no adult, one time we got carried out of a hospital while we were praying, haha each time I tell that story, i keep saying “I don”t know how we got outside the hospital” we were carried by the nurses…lol.

I remembered those songs I wrote and taught the kids, small and short as I was, and I’m smiling as I write this. Those plays we acted. Those days of Andrew, Bolaji, Philipa, Ejiro and many whose names I don’t remember, we were eight,but mostly us 5.

Yea, I was a stubborn child but it’s funny how daddy remembers this and always uses it to encourage me in tough times that God never forgets me, and then he reminds me of seriously awkwardly tough situations that God has brought me out of before…immediately after the last big miracle, my youngest sister said “Love, it’s principle, show me the way”, I said there is no principle dear, it’s grace, remember, not of works…and she said “No, Love, this one is definitely by principle” and then she too talked about one thing I did loooonnnggggg agooooo, i don’t know if I should say it. I was a child, and it was awkward, in fact it was awkward to the point that even the Pastor thought it was a missing item…I’d given it to God, I loved it, but…cant explain…

i’ll keep that for another day,but really, I may have done many weird weird things and made sacrifices just because I love this God but I feel, He always brings me out cos He is God. And he knows deep in my heart who I am, my motive and He is committed to a plan.

God is committed to a plan for your life so hang in there, God has not forgotten your labour of love. If my earthly father remembers, amidst all those times I was a strong-willed and stubborn child, lol, (good stubborn not bad stubborn..still stubborn 😀 ) I’m sure God will never forget you, nor his plans for you.

NO MAN IS KEEPING HIMSELF FOR YOU

Last weekend, I unveiled my printer. There was no ceremony, lol, it’s just that I forgot to buy printing paper, and then on the way I remembered and said meh, I might have some test paper at home. That’s how I left it in the box for almost a week.

Finally, I did all the opening on Saturday. Transparent plastic removal, cord-releasing, ink sachet tearing, fresh smell-inhaling and said “hmmmm, like a virgin”…and I laughed alone.

    Some people have asked why I don’t drink saying “Is it for religious reasons or personal principles?” I’ll apply that question to why I don’t think it’s outdated and uncool to keep my legs closed… Is it because Jesus wants us to, or just my own personal principles? Well both of them, and I must add health reasons too, and psychological balance, ergo because Jesus says so, since all these other reasons are part of his plan.

I will never forget a married man in 2012 who taught he would never give up. As usual I didn’t tell him whether or not I had been with anyone, he just started preaching and he was the one who dropped the “No man is keeping himself for you” line. In fact if you are Nigerian, he said it like this “…no man is keeping himself for you O, you future husband will be somewhere now sleeping with other women and you want to form good girl”

O….but isn’t that grace? Isn’t that what marriage is about? Unmerited favour, overlooking, forgiveness, third chances, don’t you just feel special when God loves you in spite of how terrible you are and he still daily loads you with benefits?

(I’m not saying you shouldn’t care if your spouse has an STD from careless choices but let’s save that for another post)

WHAT’S THE COMPETITION?
In the same vein, a new friend I just made said that there is a possibility that if you marry a spouse who was as chaste as you were, he won’t value your chastity, to him it’s no big deal, he did it too.

(A weird mentality for any man to possess, not totally impossible, but it’s debatable.)

Let me see,… it’s not a competition that we’re bringing into the wedding night now is it? :


“Aha! You’re not a virgin, I said it” like when you finally see the meat your sister hid under her rice

“You’re not one either, who taught you how to unlock a bra?” Index finger abruptly pointing like it’s testing the temperature of a red hot coal

“Why would you judge me simply because I unlocked a bra?” Straight face, mouth open

“Wait, is this what our relationship has been about? How we’ll land on this bed and find out if we lied about our histories? Marriage is 5% sex and 95% living together” voice of a preacher lady

“O, so now you’re Myles Munroe” shaking head frantically

“What has gotten into you?” Looking surprised and confused

“You lieeeeeeeeddddddddd” eyes popping out of the sockets

“Who doesn’t?” Looking around like she just defended the helpless

“So now our marriage is based on a lie” sits up back against the headboard

“Please, you’re over-reacting” turns to the side, adjusts pillow

“How is this overreacting?” Voice turned up by one notch

“Did you ask me to marry you because you wanted to marry a virgin or because you wanted to be with me?” Trying to play cool

“I thought you were youuuuuuu, for youuuuuuu” presents an invisible her to her with palms open and facing the ceiling

“By a hymen?” Taciturn as a mafian don

“You didn’t have to lie”

“You didn’t have to sleep with other girls too before you proposed to me, now those girls are going to their husbands hymen-less” DJ turning it up too now

“At least those girls won’t lie”

“You shouldda married them” the last word landed on high note
“There’s no themmmmm, it’s you I wanted”
“So, we’re here now, what’s the big deal”
“You liedddddddd”
“O, so it’s not about the hymen?”
“No, it’s the lieeeee”
“Really….but you lied too”
“How?”
“How did you learn to unlock a bra?”
“O, thaaaat???” Points at the door like ‘it’ just walked out
“Yeap” feeling like Olivier Pope
“I see it on TVeeeeeee”
“Hmm…. I fell off a mango tree and split my legs apart”
“Is that another lie?”
“Please sleep, our friends and family think we’re married, some of them haven’t taken their shoes off yet”
“Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeew….. I’m a married man” sarcastically…. “Strike one”
“Meh, I love you two”

Back to my blog…On my part, I would give respects to anyone who would keep themselves till they’re twenty five, or more (as singles I mean). Cos I know how much principle is required to do that and how how much discipline is applied in waiting, especially when you finally found a worthy man and you like him, and he’s hot.

My case has never been that of a lack of opportunity, it must be the OCPD or the Relationship OCPD that wants everything perfect, that wants to see the end.

WHAT IF NEVER?
I remember some guy in 2012, he wasn’t bad, he just didn’t get any, at least frm me, not even a hug, he said “Don’t go and die a virgin o, sex is sweet, you don’t want to miss out” Blah…. Thanks for the publicity!

I remember clearly earlier, in my pre-teens, one teenage meeting during an Agape Force convention, (I wasn’t in my teens yet, so in the group, I just had one leg in, but I liked the group), as an admonition, don’t know what led to it, Oge said, “if having sex will make me miss heaven, let me die before sex” I have never forgotten that line, maybe everyone else has but the picture of that meeting is still clear even now as I write.

Funny though, one time I was talking to Kimberly, I said, if Christ comes and people are being taken up in the sky, I might just give that puppy frown and say “it’s not fair God, I didn’t have sex..whyyyyyy?” And she, being married laughed and replied, “Is that better than going to heaven???”
Actually when that day comes, I won’t be thinking of anything else, the most supreme Groom is here, let’s go!

BUT HERE’S MORE:
This post is not intended to create any hype.
It is possible to still have a hymen and yet be sexually impure. Or to be sexually pure and still have other ‘issues’ with God, or issues that make you difficult to live with or make you unbearable in a human society, that people wonder how your family copes with you and pity in advance for the man you end up with.

It’s also possible to be the sweetest girl in the world and still be a door, because you gave your heart to someone, got abused, made some mistakes.

It also is likely that you were ignorant before, had no one to talk to you, weren’t exposed to the idea of self-respect, assertiveness, self pride and esteem or you just had to earn a living somehow, or go up the social ladder, but in your heart you’re still virtuous.

My darling God takes what’s ‘broken’ and makes it beautiful.

If you come to God, telling him how much you need him, you won’t just start life all over, he can take you from where you are and make you a centre of attraction, a brand new, priceless treasure. It’s about the eye that sees you and how He sees you.

If I get a used toaster from my sister’s kitchen and bring into mine, I might even value it more than she ever did, or more than my other new appliances which I pulled out of the box.

Who knows, there may really be no man keeping himself for you, but there’s a king who’s praying for the best, despite his initial bad taste and shortcomings, that’s value!

It’s the eye that sees you, as priceless!
It’s precious, and it’s mine….my Precious! (No, not Smeagul)

If you talk to any well-meaning elderly woman, they’ll always end it with “it’s better to wait” every one likes their delivery sealed and intact, whether it’s pizza, letters or cars.

*As for the drama, they made up and made out and lived happily ever after..hehe*

Above all, guard your heart with all diligence…if your heart is guarded, you’ll make sound choices. 🙂